“You what?! You’re where?!”

So yes, I’ve moved to Sweden — a place that’s much colder than Canada. I know I swore to you all I’d never live in a country colder than Canada, yet here I am. There’s something clearly wrong with me.

I didn’t choose this path — surprise surprise! No, I didn’t choose Sweden and I didn’t choose the company either. I can truly say the company chose me (that’s another post altogether!) and after 1 year of recruitment efforts, I was on the path of no return.

The past two months have been a whirlwind, for not just me, but my mum and dad, and for J. I was so incredibly busy packing my entire house, taking care of logistics like mail, car insurance, health insurance, and on top of that, doing some renovation (tiling, painting, light adjusting, etc). The one thing I enjoyed the most however, was researching and shopping for a bike, all the accessories that go with it (lights, helmet, locks, etc), and taking a crash course in Bike Maintenance. After weeks of visiting bike stores, road testing, and speaking to experts in Toronto and Burlington, J and I ended up at Ancaster Cycle in well, Ancaster, of all places! J drove an hour to get to me, and then we drove another 45 minutes to get to Dave who was incredibly helpful with our two purchases.

Yes, we bought TWO bikes! One for him, and one for me! And being the Asian that I am, I swung an awesome deal! 😀

With that load off my shoulder, J surprised me with my bike locks! I crawled the internet looking for my perfect bell and found it! Bells from The Crane Bell Company ring just like my old bike in Japan. The nostalgic touch that would make it mine!

For 3 weeks after I received news of my visa approval, I was crazy busy packing boxes for storage, for the air shipment, and for taking with me to Sweden. I threw away old clothes, electronics, and managed to list some items on Kijiji and Facebook. I just couldn’t bear throwing them in the garbage and heaven knows I had no time for a garage sale. I hardly slept those 3 weeks — packing until 4 or 5 in the morning and then getting up at 10 am to do it all over again. Luckily Dad was around as he was finishing up the renovations, and when J finished work, he’d find his way over to help my Dad out. I have never been so appreciative and grateful for his patience and energy. He works from 6 am until 6 or 7 pm everyday but still finds time to be with me. Almost every single night he stayed with me in the home that was turning into a shell of a house as the days grew on until the inevitable.

Finally everything was packed. I still had no sleep. Ms. S checked in on me and so did CM. CM offered to help me even though she was just barely able to take care of herself while recovering from surgery. M checked in on me and she lives in Stoney Creek! These are my true friends and its interesting how when shit hits the fan, that’s when you truly know who your real friends are.

The day came for me to fly. Dad and J saw me to the airport and J helped check me in. I tried my best to fight back tears. I’m not a crybaby I thought. I had no idea what the future had in store for me. Will I like my job? Will I make a difference while I’m there? Will my colleagues like me? Will J and I see each other again? Will I like Sweden? Can I be strong? Will I be happy? All these thoughts flooded my body at one instant that I just couldn’t keep the tears in. And then I realized, I didn’t want to go. It was the first time I’ve ever felt this way at any airport, especially when I knew I was leaving on another adventure. This time, it didn’t feel like an adventure to me. I just wanted to go home and hide.

I hugged J so hard, kissed him one last time, and knowing that I had no choice, I turned away and walked through to Security as solemnly as walking the plank.

On the plane, I was so exhausted I cried myself to sleep. Thank goodness for Premium Economy.

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Ancaster Cycle, CPH, Crane Bell, Malmö